things that permanently altered my brain chemistry before age 15

 

• realizing people can just… dislike you for no reason and you still have to sit beside them in math class

• getting cheated on 

• being “mature for your age” 

• hearing adults say “you’ll understand when you’re older” and then getting older and realizing THEY were insane 

• group chats going silent after you text

• finding out pretty girls can still get embarrassed publicly. devastating information

• having unrestricted internet access at age 11. genuinely what happened there

• the specific humiliation of someone saying “ew they like you”

• school presentations

• realizing friendship breakups hurt worse than actual relationships sometimes

• adults acting like getting straight A’s was life or death 

• the first time someone called me “too much” and suddenly i developed a lifelong fear of double texting

• being left out ONCE and carrying it 

• discovering people talk about you when you leave rooms

• trying so hard to seem chill 

• the first time you realize attention is not the same thing as love

• asking “are you mad at me” every 17 minutes 

• adults saying “these are the best years of your life” while you’re actively having the worst time imaginable 😭